There was a distinct moment when the Tears of the Kingdom hype train stopped being fun and exciting and instead became obnoxious and unbearable. For many months I was riding that train with eager anticipation like everyone else, and it was fun dissecting each new trailer for clues and trading theories. I remember the energy in the air when Nintendo finally revealed Link’s new abilities during a livestream last month, and how excited everyone was to create their own mechanical marvels with Ultrahand.

But just a week later, something happened that shifted the entire mood. Suddenly, everyone got anxious and weird, and started arguing a lot. It was no longer safe to scroll through social media or click links about Zelda. Everyone was terrified of what they might see. The weeks leading up to the launch of Tears of the Kingdom were dark days online, because the game had leaked, and spoilers were out there.

This happens to pretty much all Nintendo games these days. I don’t pretend to understand the finer details of it, but a security weakness on the original 2017 model of the Switch makes it possible for people to download games weeks before launch and emulate them on other types of hardware, like the Steam Deck. It seems it's incredibly easy, which means lots of people did it, which means there were a lot of spoilers out there, which means Nintendo fans were getting irrationally upset over a video game again.

I’ve seen a lot of corporate bootlicking in my day, but the reaction to TOTK leaks was on another level. I saw people bragging about filing DMCA takedown requests against YouTubers that posted leaks on Nintendo’s behalf. Kotaku was crucified for publishing an article that described non-story information from the leaks. The anti-leak fervor was so intense that people were raging at Nintendo for sharing an interview with the developers that ‘confirmed’ TOTK has dungeons, as if a thing that’s been in every single Zelda game ever is somehow a spoiler. It was unhinged, but then the game came out and everything changed.

Since midnight on Thursday, my social media feeds have been nothing but non-stop Zelda spoilers. I have seen every location, every enemy, every Zonai part, every companion, every ability - I’ve seen everything. My TikTok feed is full of tutorials and tips, and people on Twitter are posting clips of wacky contraptions with reckless abandon. The internet is an endless feed of Zelda spoilers right now, and no one is upset about it at all.

To be clear, I think this is great. I love seeing everyone’s TOTK videos, even if they reveal things about the game I haven’t seen yet myself. I’m both impressed and inspired by other people’s feats, and I’m taking in a lot of valuable info that I’ll use in my own playthrough. This isn’t just ‘fine’, it’s an important part of the Zelda experience. BOTW and TOTK are so deep and complex, it’s become necessary for players to share information to increase the public knowledge base. This is a significant cultural moment, and being able to share our experience with the game through clips is an important part of that. Seeing spoilers doesn’t bother me at all and it doesn’t seem to bother anyone else either, but it sure as hell did a couple of weeks ago.

Every single thing mentioned in Kotaku’s article - which you didn’t have to read if you didn’t want to - I’ve now seen on my Twitter feed. Why was it such a grand offense when Kotaku did it before, but it's okay for everyone to do now? Why were people so upset with content creators that they were impersonating Nintendo to take legal action against them, but now anyone can make a TikTok showing anything they want? They’re still spoilers whether the game is released yet or not, right?

The most impressive Ultrahand creations have become the most viral clips of the game. Everyone has seen the wicker man with his dick on fire, the missile launching battle mech, and the horrifying ways you can torture a Korok, but the irony is that the people making this stuff are the same ones getting DMCA striked last week. Do you think all of these people mastered the game, maxed out all of their stats, and pulled off all of these incredible feats over the weekend? The coolest TOTK clips are coming from people who have been playing the game for weeks. People wanted them dead back then, but they love their content now.

It was never about the spoilers, of course. Everyone who was so worked up about spoilers was actually just mad that someone was playing the game and they weren’t. They didn’t care about protecting the integrity of their virgin experience - which isn’t a particularly noble aspiration anyway - they were just jealous. Other people were having fun without them, so they shit their pants and cried spoilers.

Next time this happens - and there will be a next time - you don’t have to hide behind spoilers. Just join them. Preorder the game, pay for it, then pirate it. If you’re that upset that other people are playing a game early, go play with them. Apparently it's very easy, and that way you don’t have to pretend to care about spoilers for two weeks until the game comes out, then suddenly spoilers aren’t that big of a deal anymore. And if you just hate Kotaku, you can just say you hate Kotaku - don’t pretend you have any real reason for it. Whatever you decide to do, there are a lot better uses of your time than pretending to be mad about spoilers on the internet.

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