Fusing items to weapons is a staple mechanic in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom. The main idea is to collect various parts, whether monster parts or special items like gemstones, and fuse them onto a base weapon to become more powerful and durable.
Sure, you could fuse Bokoblin horns to broadswords. But where's the fun with that? Hyrule is full of silly, strange, or outright odd ways to combine your weapons and shields. If you've had enough of the high-efficiency weapons and want to try something that'll put a smile on your face, give these fuse combos a try.
10 The Bouncy Branch
This is the only entry the game developers designed to be a 'funny weapon.' When you fuse a mushroom (any kind) to a weapon, it becomes a Bouncy weapon. Your final strike to an attack combo will cause the target to go flying much further than usual, similar to how the toy hammer in Breath of the Wild operated.
It's silly, for sure. And watching enemies big and small ragdoll around by the might of a mushroom is great. The only downside is that the far-flying feature means that combat will take an annoyingly long time, half of which is spent running after your fly ball-koblin.
9 The SwordSword And ShieldShield
You know how some folks will stuff a turkey inside of another turkey for Thanksgiving and call it a Turturkeykey? This is like that, but dumber. The recipe is simple: combine any sword with another sword, a shield with another shield, and so on. They're always an overall improvement over the unfused base materials and can be used for longer.
More than just a joke; it's a sign of human progress. "What if sword, but two?" activates the same neurons in our brains as our ancestors when they smacked rocks together until they became tools, fires, and iPhones. Everyone's first silly fusion is the SwordSword, and it opens our minds to allow for greater things to come.
8 A Pitchfork With Any Food Item
We're sure that the whole joke of pitchforks being giant dinner forks have been made for as long as there have been pitchforks. But it's lasted so long for a reason. In a world where the stakes mean the death and destruction of innocent lives and landscapes, proding the Demon King with a banana on a fork is still funny. To make one, find a Pitchfork and whatever combinable food item you prefer.
It's like those "here comes the choo-choo!" games you play with babies to get them to eat their mushy baby food. But instead of feeding them, you repeatedly bash a whole hydromelon in their face. This works especially well for monsters you've died to once before. Revenge is a dish best served cold, after all.
7 The Boulder Shield
There's beauty in simplicity, and that's where the Boulder Shield Shines. Awkwardly protruding from whatever poor shield it was fused with, this is the result of a boulder combining with any shield. It's already terribly outlandish, with most of Link hidden behind the sizable rock.
That's not the best part of it, however. Shield surfing with this combo will yield completely predictable results. Link will topple over himself, trying to balance on top of the lumpy, off-weight piece of equipment. Is it efficient? No. Did we spit out an elixir seeing Link try anyway? Absolutely.
Bonus: Boulder Shield In Action
We know that the appeal of the Boulder Shield may not be extremely apparent on paper. So to really drive home what makes this so funny, we've included an animated GIF above highlighting what happens when you shield surf with it.
6 The Bomb Sword
This melee weapon of mutually assured destruction is only for the well-armored and particularly reckless. Even so, there's no denying how effective it is. A simple fusion of one Bomb Flower on any melee weapon, with one connecting swing, you're guaranteed a tremendously powerful attack against anyone foolish enough to come within striking distance.
A wiser Hero might think to fuse the bomb to a shield instead, protecting you from the blast. But we're not here to be smart; we're here to send a message, a message that says "I swear on Hylia, I will take us both out."
Bonus: Using The Bomb Sword
Unlike the Boulder Shield, the Bomb Sword's functionality is abundantly clear. But we know that you'll want to see it anyway. We've made the sacrifice ourselves to show you just how bombastic using this weapon combo is.
5 A Cheese Arrow
Due to the greater level of limitation on arrows, there isn't a whole lot of humor to be found among their fusions. Sure, everyone's tried a meat arrow, but in our experience, it doesn't measure up to the dairy-rich smack of a high-velocity cheese wedge.
The fusion doesn't do anything special, but the knowledge of dealing a lethal blow with a piece of cheese certainly makes us happy. It's not the easiest resource either, requiring a small side quest to unlock and a manual milk trade to get more of.
Insert obligatory "Sharp Cheddar" pun here. Or maybe "Brie"-koblin?
4 The Obnoxiously Long Hoe
Do you like farming but hate going outside? Then you need an obnoxiously long hoe. This fusion, a farming hoe attached to the end of any standard spear weapons, is a testament to mankind's willingness to take things a little bit too far. In this case, about 12 feet. Link's below-average body height only makes this weapon combo even better.
You can achieve ridiculous levels of range like this by fusing any two spear weapons together. But after several hours of rigorous testing, we've determined that the farming hoe was the funniest of them all. Though to give credit where due, the mop did come pretty close.
3 The Extravagant Fish Shield
True art requires balance. A Ying and Yang. And only one shield combo achieves this perfectly: the extravagant fish shield. To make this masterpiece, fuse a cooked fish (fire, not cooking pot) with the most luxurious and dazzling shield you can find. Our favorite was the Radiant Shield variety of Gerudo shield. Nothing says 'class' like gluing a fish to rubies and gold.
If the opulence isn't doing it for you, try leaning into the rural by fusing it to a forest shield or one of the bokoblin shields. This will give it a hunting trophy vibe that will surely get even the most Country of Zelda fans to stare in envy.
2 The President Hudson Shield
No longer do you have to explore Hyrule alone. No, we don't mean the sage ability mechanic. We're talking about the one true friend we have throughout both Breath of the Wild and Tears of the Kingdom: Hudson. This uncommon combo is a fusion between any shield and the President Hudson display found in Tarrey Town.
This combo is best enjoyed with a two-handed weapon like a claymore or spear. Sure, it can't actually do any protecting that way. But when you have the beautiful visage of this mustached macho man watching your back, you won't need to block.
1 The Mop Of Meat
The recipe to sin is a short one: Take a mop, and fuse a piece of meat to the end. This is absurdity incarnated into one concentrated polearm. Neither the great sages of the past nor the Demon King Ganondorf himself ever even thought to prepare for the Mop of Meat. Because no one in their right mind would ever consider gluing a thick cut of sirloin to the end of janitorial equipment.
Unfortunately for your enemies, Link is not exactly a person in their right mind. Maybe it was the dying and resting for 100 years in the last game, or maybe it was getting sucked empty like a Capri Sun in the introduction to Tears of the Kingdom. Either way, there is only one weapon combo in all of Hyrule capable of keeping up with this feral little Hylian, and it's the Mop of Meat.