It has been more than 30 years since the launch of the very first Kirby game. It's an incredible achievement for any video game series to last that long, yet it only came to light very recently that even those of us who have been playing Kirby games for decades know very little about the little puffball that has become a firm Nintendo favorite. All Kirby games are rooted in the pink protagonist's ability to inhale pretty much anything and, in most cases, adopt the powers of whatever he hoovers up, but have you ever paused to think how something like that is even possible?

Polygon recently had HAL Laborotory's executive director Shinya Kumazaki in a room and asked the Kirby creator some hard-hitting questions. Perhaps the question that hit the hardest is what exactly happens to Kirby's enemies after he inhales them. We know that a lot of the time he assumes their power. Whether that be the ability to breathe fire, surf on water he can conjure out of nothing, or simply steal their hat and sword.

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Kirby disposes of the enemy after he has stolen their power, but how exactly he does that has never been explained. Until now. The good news is no, the naughty residents of Dream Land do not slip down Kirby's stretchy gullet into his stomach, doomed to slowly die in a pool of stomach acid, get digested and, well, you know the rest. Kumazaki confirmed what actually happens is after Kirby has stolen his enemies' powers, his insides teleport them elsewhere.

Kirby's Dream Buffet Kirbys in a row

Time to breathe a big sigh of relief, right? Yes, but on the other hand, if anything, I now have more questions than I did before. Largely because prior to Kumazaki being asked if Kirby eats people, like most of you, I had never assumed that might have been what was happening. So, those enemies are being sent elsewhere. The first question I have is where are they being sent? Are they popping up elsewhere on Kirby's home planet ready to face him again one day, determined not to be eaten a second time? Also, does Kirby decide where he sends them or is their destination random? I'm picturing a Star Wars trash compactor situation, although that might be even darker than Kirby simply digesting the enemies himself.

Unlike Kumazaki, I'm unable to gloss over the lower-powered enemies Kirby ingests. Not every baddie is worthy enough of having their power adopted by the adorable Nintendo mascot because, well, they don't really have a power. They just sort of get in the way so Kirby inhales them, turns them into a star bullet in his mouth or stomach or whatever is going on in there, and then fires them out at other enemies or an obstacle in his way. What happens to those poor souls? Are they dead now, their remains compressed like a diamond by Kirby's insides until they become a shiny star that can clear away anything in its path? Or has Kirby simply pulled them out of his inner teleportation device, so he can fire them out? Either way, sounds painful.

Also ignored is Kirby's ever-presence in the Super Smash Bros. series. The arena in which Kirby's abilities might well be the most impressive. The pink puffball's powers of teleportation digestion clearly don't apply to the Smash Bros. games, otherwise any match with him as a participant would be incredibly short. Kirby inhaling an opponent and holding them in his gut for a second or two would send them to some other undetermined location, winning him the match as soon as he managed to eat everyone else on the field.

kirby sat in some cake icing

Sticking with Smash, I'm also a little confused as to what happens to the inhaled party's power after they have been transported elsewhere. Are they left to fend for themselves without their sword or spikes because Kirby has them now, or do they at least have something they can use to defend themselves when they are dropped in a new, probably completely unfamiliar location? Kirby clearly just mimics powers in Smash as the character he has stolen them from can still use them too after they've been regurgitated. However, that power fades which is not the case in Kirby games, leading me to believe the beast Kirby has taken the ability from has been left powerless.

Reading all of the above back, I am a little worried I've developed sympathy for Kirby's enemies (not to mention the realization I have far too much free time on my hands to think about the inner workings of fictional characters). That's going to make my continued playthrough of Return to Dream Land Deluxe incredibly problematic. Kumazaki's lore comments do have me concerned for Kirby in one way. His world is littered with food he can hoover up and eat, but what happens to it after that? While Kirby seems to enjoy it, since he doesn't fire it back out of his mouth, (thankfully) I can only assume once in his stomach, the food and drink Kirby finds is being transported elsewhere. Does that mean that last piece of cake you ate in The Forgotten Land is actually the same one you've eaten 30 times before? Kind of like learning that the water you're drinking probably also passed through a dinosaur and then a bunch of other people before it got to you.

The good news to pull from all of this is that Kirby isn't digesting living things as you move him forward through his games. The bad news is the now-assumed alternative, at least for me, might be just as dark. That Kirby is stripping some of his enemies of their power and sending them somewhere random to die, and contorting those he doesn't deem worthy into stars and shooting them at their friends. Yeah, he might look cute, but however you frame it, Kirby is a pretty dark guy.

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